During adolescence age 10--16 I had boyfriends and girlfriends. was good at sports--though not varsity material. Even then I was more comfortable in the company of girls. They have always been my favorite people. But I have on occasion been accused of placing them on uncomfortable pedestals.

At 14 I acquired a corset by nefarious means and managed to build a "vest pocket" wardrobe. These things were discovered by my Dad one Sunday afternoon when he was cleaning out a storage area. I'm sure my explanation was unsatisfactory but I heard about it only

once.

My youth from 14 to 18 was very stormy. My inconsiderate be- havior in the questionable goal of maturing rapidly still revolts me. I know for a fact that I precipitated most of the grey hair my mother bears today. I had my intermittant TV, midnight driving les- sons, sans license, several mad passionate love affairs and a number of decent part time jobs.

After one false start I went to college and got a degree in Mec- hanical Engineering. At college I kept my "ruffles" in my laundry bag. Of course I've had periods of violent recriminations and res- olutions but to no avail. (I was 28 years old when I finally resol- ved to live at peace with TV.) While at college, shortly before en- tering military service, I met my future wife. From this point until after our wedding two years later I was almost immune to my TV drive. I kidded myself into believing that marriage would erase the desire. Well, it's pretty common knowledge now, that this is highly unlikely, and that the smarter course would have been a frank discussion before marriage.

Early in our marriage (6 mo.) the desire revived in full force and I frequented "Goodwill" Stores accumulating clothes to be sec- reted in our apartment. After three years of secret dressing I decided to tell my wife and ask for her understanding rather than risk untoward discovery. I'm afraid that my explanation was blurted out haltingly and guiltily and got only the frosty reception I real- ly expected.

For four miserable years after that we waged a losing battle for the psychological and spiritual success of our marriage. We went steadily downhill until at our darkest moment, when we were at a final turning point, I told my wife that I loved her, that there would be no divorce (I would fight any and all actions) and, should I lose her, I would rot in jail before paying one cent of alimony.

48.